Chapter 02
They had moved out of the compound to an apartment across the street, because Tessa didn’t like it that Niklaus liked to have the gates unlocked, but she also didn’t want to have to pull chests of drawers in front of the door every time she went asleep.
Granted, Dorothy hadn’t shown herself for months and Tessa admitted that it was because of the run in she had with Klaus while she was out and painting.
Tessa liked the apartment because it had two bedrooms, and Kol would lock the door every night and take the keys into his room with him. It was great to see the progress of the Bella system as the weeks and months passed. Tessa remained on the forefront and there were no interruptions from the rest of them. He wasn’t sure why, but he was grateful for that.
Was it strange that he liked Tessa that much? Wouldn’t it be incredibly weird if he’d start dating her, loving her, like a woman should be loved? It were things he obsessed about. But he wouldn’t care about what other people would think, and Tessa herself said that every alter could have a relationship with someone if they wanted to, if she’d allow them to come forward and live their own lives.
But she didn’t.
And he was grateful for that. Because he wasn’t sure if he could see her with someone else even though it wasn’t her.
This sucked.
How long could he be friends with someone and not kill them or fuck them senseless? He’d started to resent Myriam for roping him in for her saving the girls scheme, but she kept saying that this was his own fault, because they never took saved girls home with them. Ever.
Shot himself in the food then.
He woke up to hearing giggling in the living room. Dressing quickly, he left his bedroom to see what was going on, and he found not-Tessa sitting on the table munching on popcorn while watching the television. Cartoons. “Uh, good morning, Dorothy.”
“Morning!” Dorothy replied with a mouthful of popcorn, not taking her eyes off the TV.
He sat down on the sofa, looking at her back and scratched his head. Why would Dorothy be out? Tessa had been with him for the last few months, what was going on? “How long have you been awake?”
“Uhhhh. No idea, but Tessa left you a message,” she said as she pointed at the kitchen counter. “She told me I can be here all day and no one is going to stop me.”
He quickly retrieved the note and sat back down again. “That’s unusual.”
“I like it,” Dorothy grinned. “Do you have pencils? Paper?”
“No,” Kol replied as he started to read the note.
Sorry to spring this on you without any warning, but my full attention is required in the system. I trust that you will be alright with Dorothy, but there are a few rules you need to follow because she’s so precious to our system.
- Do not take her outside. You can take her to your brother’s home across the street but other than that, don’t get any ideas.
- Do not talk about the system unless she offers, but she doesn’t know a lot and things might be inaccurate anyway. She’s a child.
- She’s a child. Treat her as such.
- DO NOT TAKE HER OUTSIDE.
- DO NOT LEAVE HER ALONE.
Tessa.
“Darling, why aren’t I allowed to take you outside?” Kol asked Dorothy as he scratched his head.
Dorothy sighed and turned around on the table to face him. “I’m seven years old. This body isn’t. Obviously. The system doesn’t like us in the outside world because we can’t pretend we’re Bella. Or Tessa.”
“Ah, ashamed then? Afraid of funny looks?”
Dorothy shrugged.
“That’s alright, darling,” Kol smiled at her. “We’ll give you the best day of your life at Nik’s house.”
“No.”
“No?”
“I don’t like him! He yelled at me for painting!”
“All the more reason to go over to his home so he can apologize to you, and as our revenge, I’ll have Myriam get things you like. Get a pony for the day and paint that you’re allowed to use. A trampoline? Sugary sweets?” When Dorothy’s eyes grew big in excitement he nodded. “Very well, that’s a plan.” He texted the plan to Myriam with some explanation before he looked at Dorothy again. “Have you had breakfast yet?”
“I had popcorn,” Dorothy giggled.
“Not good enough, not to worry, Niklaus has excellent cooks and the breakfast table will be set up soon,” Kol smiled at her before getting up. “Now, you continue to watch your cartoon, I need to do something by myself for a few minutes.”
“Okay!” Dorothy turned around again and started humming to herself while she watched the cartoon. Kol went to his bedroom and grabbed a bag of blood. He and Tessa were going to have a word if she’d come back later. There was no way in hell that he was equipped to take care of a 7-year-old all day long, when she wasn’t supposed to go outside.
Myriam’s texts were nothing but laughing emojis before she said that she’d arrange something and that breakfast was served.
~o.O.o~
Dorothy froze when she saw Kol’s brother and basically refused to walk into the courtyard. Sighing, Kol lifted her up and continued to walk. Dorothy had absolutely no choice in the matter, if he was going to take care of a child, his brother and his wife were going to help him. “Niklaus!” he called out. “You’re a big meanie!”
“I’ve done a lot of mean things in my life, Kol, you’d have to be more specific!” Klaus said as he leaned over the balcony to see his brother walk in with the rescue in his arms. Tessa. Bella. Whoever she was today.
“A few months ago, when Dorothy here was out roaming the compound and stumbled upon your study and started to paint, you reacted like a spoiled brat. A meanie. This is the first time Dorothy has come out to play again and she’s scared of you.”
“Good.”
“Nik!”
Klaus hopped down and walked to his brother and the girl. “A lot of people shake in their boots in fear when they hear my name, because they know that I can be really mean to them,” he had some difficulty trying to make things as simple and not awful as Kol had requested. “But that also means that my name keeps you safe as long as you’re here. You have nothing to fear from me, little Swan, just don’t touch my paints again. Instead… why won’t you come with me to the study after we’ve had something to eat? I have a surprise for you.”
“You do?”
Klaus nodded slowly. “I’m not going to spoil the surprise for you, so let’s have breakfast. I believe we have some pancakes and waffles this morning.”
Dorothy wiggled herself out of Kol’s hold and darted to the area where Klaus pointed to. “I love pancakes!”
“Can Tessa do this to you?”
Kol shrugged at his brother’s question. “She’s been pretty stable in not switching, especially after Bobbie ‘retired’. Whatever is going on, it’s serious enough for her to allow Dorothy out all day. She needs her focus in her inside world, apparently. Can’t share.”
“Do you reckon she can live on her own by now?”
“I suppose, it depends. She can take care of herself, which is what we want, but I am not sure if I want to let her go.”
“Kol.”
“What? I like her.”
“She’s a little kid right now.”
“No, that’s not Tessa, that’s Dorothy,” Kol pointed out as he walked after the girl and saw her devour a pancake as she was sitting on her knees in her chair. “Easy, darling,” he sat down next to her and poured her a glass of orange juice. “Good morning, Myriam,” Kol smiled at his brother’s wife.
“Good morning you two,” Myriam said as she crouched down next to Dorothy with a hairbrush in her hands. “Tessa dressed you, but what about your hair? What would you like? Because I know that Kol is not good in that department, either.”
Dorothy giggled. “I’m feeling like a princess today!”
“But that’s because you are,” Myriam replied as she softly started to brush her hair. Of course, it was strange to have a child on your hands while the body was 20 years of age, but Myriam was going to take the opportunity anyway. Kol asked for help, she was definitely going to stick around and help him out. “How about a braid? Make your hair really pretty?”
Dorothy looked at Kol with a hopeful look on her face.
“You’re safe here, darling, if you don’t want Myriam to touch your hair, just say no.”
“But I want to!” Dorothy replied as she stuffed her face with another pancake.
After breakfast, Klaus took Dorothy to his study where an extra easel with paint and canvas was set up. After making her promise that she’d only use her own canvas and easel to paint on, she painted for an hour with his brother, a big smile on her face as she kept humming songs.
Myriam had arranged a trampoline, and later a pony as Dorothy loved ponies and by dinner time, the girl was passed out on the sofa in the courtyard with a big, satisfied smile on her face. “Job well done,” Myriam grinned.
“I’m so glad we won’t ever be able to have children of our own,” Kol replied as he lifted Dorothy from the sofa. “Although I do have to admit, I’m glad she’s a good little girl.”
Myriam hummed for an answer before finding the words. “Be careful with your words. There might be more children hiding inside of her and they might not be as easy going as Dorothy should they choose to come out.”
“It’ll be fine,” Kol beamed at her. “I’ve got you!”
She bit her lip then. “She’s been with you for months, and don’t get me wrong, but you’re not… I mean, isn’t it time you find her somewhere safe to live?”
“She is safe,” Kol countered angrily. “I’m fine, she’s fine. Never been better,” he said before picking up the sleeping child. “You sent me to get her, if you’re not happy with how we’re doing, it’s your own fault. Thanks for helping me with her today, but we’re going home.”
Myriam sighed and stopped him. “Kol, what I’m trying to say is that you’re… volatile. Like the rest of us. What if you snap and accidentally kill her? All that saving for nothing. That’s why we don’t bring them back home with us.”
“Why is it that whenever I act like you lot want me to, that eventually you regret coaching me on that behaviour and you’re waiting for me to snap?” Kol hissed, not wanting to wake Dorothy. “You’re unbelievable!”
“Kol,” Klaus called from his position on the balcony before jumping down to join his wife. “Don’t get angry because Myriam’s worried. Your history—”
“Is what YOU helped create, Niklaus. Don’t be a hypocrite,” Kol replied, not even bothering to lower his voice. “If you can change, why can’t I?”
“Because you’re you!”
“That’s not a good enough reason!” He quickly looked at Dorothy who was stirring and blinked when Dorothy opened her eyes, recognizing the look immediately. “I’m sorry for waking her.”
“This is awkward,” Bobbie said as Kol let go of him before he turned to Klaus and Myriam. “Whatever sick and twisted game you’re playing with Kol, it ends now. From what I can tell he’s making us feel safe and takes care of us. If Tessa hadn’t trusted him, Dorothy would have not been allowed out today,” he said evenly. “Now, we’re going to fuck off and you’re going to leave Kol the hell alone.” Bobbie then dragged Kol with him towards Kol’s flat.
“You didn’t have to do that. We often fight.”
“This was because of us,” Bobbie said as he watched Kol open the door. “And you. They have no right telling you what to do, or not to do, but that might change,” he replied as he sucked in a breath. “We need to talk.”
“Yeah, I thought you were retired.”
“I was,” Bobbie replied as he followed Kol up the stairs and immediately headed to the fridge to grab himself a beer. Opening it, he took a big gulp and let out a belch. “Oh, that’s so good.”
“You’re disgusting, mate,” Kol said as he scrunched up his nose before pouring himself a bourbon. “For you to leave retirement, there must be something going on.”
“Yeah, you could say that. And you’re not going to like it. After I’m telling you the story, I’m going to give you two options.”
“And what’s that? Either you stay or you go? Yeah, not going to happen. Whatever’s going on, you’re staying, if you want.”
“We don’t want to be a burden.”
“You’re not,” Kol said as he downed his glass in one go before pouring himself another. “So, now that’s out of the way, what’s going on? Not that I didn’t like hanging out with Dorothy with Tessa’s rules, but I’d like to have a head’s up next time, I wasn’t prepared.”
“Tessa taught you all about us. You should have been prepared, even if Tessa’d been in control for most of the time. So that’s the first thing you’re going to do tomorrow; you’re going to buy crayons and shit that kids like,” Bobbie took another sip of his beer and moved to the couch.
Bobbie had been the strong, silent type. Taking most of the torture, abuse, that the Cullens threw at them without as much as flinching, and occasionally fighting back. Ever since Kol brought them back from Forks, and before Bobbie retired, he figured out that Bobbie only talked if he, or Tessa, liked someone enough, trusted someone enough, to open up to. And he was pretty much a black or white kinda guy. “Consider it done.”
“I mean it.”
“So do I. I merely hadn’t thought about it because Dorothy hadn’t come out.”
“Expect more littles to come out,” Bobbie sighed. “Not just Dorothy. There are several others. And several other big ones.”
“Wait, what?” Kol blinked. Alright, he didn’t think it was just Tessa, Bobbie and Dorothy. He had met Lynne before, and maybe Sparkles at some point, but Tessa had told him that that’s all there was, aside from the two gatekeepers Dorothy told him about. “What happened?” Had he done something stupid? Had he mistreated the system somehow for other alters to be formed? Had Nik and Myriam been right?
“Relax,” Bobbie saw the panicked look on Kol’s face. “It’s not you, it’s… us,” he took another gulp from his beer. “So those fuckers placed two gatekeepers inside our mind, in our world. Usually people can’t mess with our world, so we don’t have a clue what happened there, but Paul and Mellie were there. And they looked like Jasper and Edward, as a reminder of who we were with.”
“That’s fucked up.”
Bobbie shrugged. “It’s smart. We were likely switching too much. It was another way of control. Problem is… Lynne broke free and killed the gatekeepers. While Tessa and I are usually in control… the control is gone. Tessa pulled me out of retirement to be the main protector but with the alters loose, it’ll be a transitional period and you might see people you haven’t seen before.”
“Okay.”
“I will ask you again—”
“No need. If you want to stay, you’re staying. You’re safe with me and if the others want to learn that they’re safe with me, then so be it,” Kol let out a sigh and nodded. “However, I was thinking of taking Tessa with me and move somewhere else, away from my siblings.”
Bobbie was quiet for a moment as he took another swig from his beer. “I’d advise against that for the time being, but I do suggest adding another lock to the door, one that this body can’t reach.” He then nodded to the door leading out to the balcony in front. “And there too.”
“Are you creating a prison for yourself?”
Bobbie let out a chuckle. “Dude, I don’t know what to expect. It’s suddenly become really crowded inside our inner world and while I have confidence that you’ll keep us safe when I can’t, it doesn’t hurt to take extra precautions.”
“You’re scared?”
Letting out a grunt, he took another swig of the bottle. “It was just us for over ten years. In all honesty I had forgotten about the rest of us, and had it been in any other situation, I would have taken us out from it but this isn’t what you signed up for, Kol. It’s unfair.”
“We’ll make do,” Kol said as he sat down next to Bobbie and got his mobile phone out. “While you’re here, let’s get some stuff for the kids, and something Tessa really likes. And you. And whatever else we need.”
“Start with a notebook and a pencil,” Bobbie smirked. “I’d like you to document who’s coming out and anything else you can find out about them. Just in case Tessa and I can’t remember them. And whomever is coming out, you explain the rules to them, just so they can hear it from someone else.”
Kol thought for a moment. “Tessa keeps a notebook where she writes stuff down in. Maybe you all should write in that.”
“I like that idea.”
He and Bobbie talked for a few hours, coming up with a game plan, until Bobbie became tired and retreated to the bedroom. Kol placed the order at Amazon for all the stuff they had spoken about for at least the littles and shot off a message to one of his allies in New Orleans that he required blood bags. He wasn’t going to give his brother the satisfaction of coming back to pick it up from the compound. He was an ass.
~o.O.o~
“Nice touch,” Tessa said as she walked out of her bedroom and pointed at the note on the door saying where they were and who they were with, all in Bobbie’s handwriting. “Morning,” she smiled at Kol. “It’s Tessa,” she pointed to herself before joining Kol at the table. “Dorothy was really happy with yesterday, you guys spoiled her!”
“It was a bit last minute, but we did what we could. How are you feeling?”
Tessa shrugged. “Tired, I suppose. Headache. Scared. Anxious. Unsure,” she reached for the coffee pot and sighed. “But safe. I suppose that’s what matters.”
“How bad is it?”
“I don’t know,” Tessa replied honestly, as she poured the coffee into her cup and added some sugar and milk to it. “I mean… it’s a mess, we’re trying to create new accomodations for everyone, and I doubt that you’ll meet everyone. Some are content where they are and actually didn’t mind being locked away, but we’re in the same boat, you and I. I don’t know what to expect. I do feel less secure in this body though, with Paul and Mellie gone, gone is also the control we had. Somewhat. Not even sure we were ever in control. And now we need to make friends and see what’s what.”
“I see,” Kol replied. This was nuts. This was a bad decision, it was insane and he wasn’t cut out for it but both Tessa and Bobbie trusted him and they had offered to leave and he didn’t want that either. “Well, we’ll make do. And if all fails, I could do something stupid.”
“Like what?”
Kol shrugged. He had given it some thought after he couldn’t sleep. If the Cold Ones could place people inside the system, then maybe he could figure it out too. It was easier for his kind of vampire to walk around in people’s brains and manipulate dreams, memories. Seeing as this was a different case, he wasn’t sure how. “I could get a few books about what you’re ailing and read them to help you better or, I don’t know, I could see if I can get inside your inner world like the Cold Ones have done and help you sort it out. Nothing invasive like they’ve done, but yeah. I don’t know. Sounds stupid.”
“It does,” Tessa smiled as she set her cup down and reached for a pastry. “Isn’t that cheating, though?”
Kol shrugged. “I’m not even sure I can do it. Nik, maybe, but me? No idea. Besides, you’ve gone through enough. And I’d never try getting into your inner world without your permission. Maybe even Bobbie’s. But you’ve earned your right to cheat. However, maybe this is part of your healing process, too.”
“Maybe,” Tessa shrugged. “It just sucks. I’ve been taking care of this body with Bobbie for years, why should we share it?”
Kol shrugged. “I don’t know, but you’re all inside that body,” he replied as he took out the notebook he’d ordered. The delivery of all the things had come earlier that morning, but he wasn’t going to overwhelm Tessa with that right now. He also produced the different color pens. “Write down your rules. Those you’ve lived by or lived by since you came home with me. And anything else you want other people to know. I know you and Bobbie are close, but what if someone comes out who’s not in tune with the both of you? If you can’t remember?”
“I know,” Tessa sighed, taking a bite out of her pastry. “I’ll try.”
“In the meantime, I need to clear an area in my flat for Dorothy or any other little that might come up, any idea where I should do that?”
Tessa hummed and pointed to the corner furthest away from any doors, but close to Kol’s room as she took another bite. And another as she stared off in space, hardly chewing. “Hmm.”
“What is it, darling?”
Tessa sighed as she started to chew again and looked at Kol with a confused look on her face before looking around as if they saw the flat for the first time, observing what was in front of them. Kol knew that this was someone else.
“Hi, I’m Kol. Don’t be afraid, you’re safe here,” he said as he looked at them. “Are you alright?”
“Y-yes,” they replied, blinking at the sound of their own voice before trying again. “Yes, of course, thank you,” they replied before continuing to eat what Tessa had been eating. “What were we talking about again?” She then devoured the pastry and took a sip of the drink as if she hadn’t had anything to eat in a while.
Kol sat down in the chair opposite her and smiled. “I was talking to Tessa about her writing down some rules for the system so that you all know what to expect and stuff like that. But seeing as you’re not Tessa, I don’t think it’ll work.”
“I’m Bella.”
Was she, tough? Possibly not. “Alright, nice to meet you, Bella.”
‘Bella’ looked around after finishing her drink, this time with bigger eyes, trying to listen to all the sounds outside. “We’re not in Forks?”
“No, we’re in New Orleans. I rescued you a few months ago.” This was strange, this alter didn’t remember anything. It was a possibility, of course, but for it to actually happen was certainly strange.
“I didn’t need rescuing. Did I agree to this? Isn’t this just kidnapping?”
Kol took his phone and showed Bella the footage from the fires in Forks. “That was us. Me, and those with you. And you chose to come with me instead of going to some safe house.” He then scrolled through his phone and found videos of Tessa being happy, and even the footage of Dorothy of the day before, jumping on the trampoline with a big, stupid grin on her face. “You have nothing to fear from me. You’re safe here and you can be yourself here. You don’t have to pretend.”
She took hold of the phone and started to scroll down the images, which Kol wasn’t exactly too pleased about as there were some images on there that he didn’t quite want a new alter to see. Mostly some of his kills, he had left Tessa alone for a few hours and he went creative and needed to share them with Myriam.
Then again, she was raised by vampires.
“Interesting art,” she eventually noted before nodding and handing him his phone back, satisfied. “You can tell Tessa that I merely wanted to see if the outside world was any better than our inside world and it’s not. I’m happy to stay inside as there’s no real function for me anyway. I don’t know why I exist and I don’t want to find out.”
Kol nodded to the notebook. “You can write that down for Tessa yourself, with all of us not knowing what to expect, I want her to read it from yourself, and not hear new experiences from me.”
“But I’m never, ever, coming back out again.”
“You don’t know that.”
“Yeah, I’m not going to write anything in that stupid notebook,” she said defiantly. “And you’re not going to make me, I can do whatever I want.”
“I’m not making you, I just said that I don’t want to have everyone else hear about you from me. It’s only fair.”
“Fair!” Bella exclaimed as she got off the chair and started to pace around like a madwoman. “You think life is fair? Life isn’t fair, the only thing that makes you believe it’s fair is the delusion of life being fair. You’re fooling yourself by thinking that!” she spat. “Just because you didn’t eat the lion doesn’t mean it won’t eat you instead!” Was that a hint of a Middle-Eastern accent?
Her response was interesting. He took his glass of orange juice and looked at her as he sipped it. Life wasn’t fair, but he made it fair for himself and those he cared about. That lion analogy was an interesting one.
“People feel entitled to things because they’ve done good in their lives, or because they’re innocent. Well boohoo, life isn’t fair, deal with it!”
“So you think it’s fair that the Cold Ones and the Shifters did what they did to you and your family?”
“I don’t see life as fair. Angels are fair, HaShem is. But life? Life is just one big mess and others might seem to have it better. Don’t mistake better for fair.”
So, he was right. HaShem. Judaism. For some reason Kol couldn’t believe that there was a Jew in the system. What did the system need them for? “You didn’t answer my question.”
“Life was never fair and it never will be. Having a fair life is a lie. I could have easily done something about the situation we were in but I didn’t.”
Kol shrugged as he took a sip of his drink, forcing himself to remain calm. He didn’t like debates or confrontation, he usually killed the opposition. “And what do you think about the punishment we gave them when I came to get you?”
“Again, I didn’t need saving! Y-you vampires are all the same! Unable to get what you want? Kill it. Manipulate it. You thought that we were in danger and you killed everyone so that you could feel better about taking a girl away from the scary Cold vampires. And nothing’s changed anyway, seeing as you’re a vampire. I’m surprised you didn’t kill us already, or do you like to play with your food?”
Provoking. Was this girl a warrior? Or did she have a death wish? “I’m not like them.” He was getting thirsty.
“Oh, come on, all vampires are the same. Every supernatural being is the same. Out for blood. To mess with ordinary humans and use them. Abuse them. Toys. Pets. Isn’t that what I am to you? I was to the Cullens and the Shifters. To the Shifters even way before I lost my parents. Always their little play thing,” she stopped pacing then and tugged on her shirt. “So tell me, Kol, what would you like me to do? How would you like to use me today?”
“You need to stop.”
“Why? Am I grating on you?” Bella smirked as she tugged some more on the shirt Tessa decided to put on them. “It’s because I’m right, aren’t I? This body and everyone in it is just a toy to you. A pet. Entertainment.”
“Stop it.”
“No,” she said curtly. “I’m merely doing what I’m supposed to be doing. As your pet.”
“Stop that right now,” Kol growled as he pushed her against the wall, causing Bella to giggle. “You are not my pet. Nor my entertainment or a toy.”
“Food?”
“Not all vampires are the same, darling, my sister-in-law likes to help those who have been hurt by the supernatural and I was sent to help you. You decided to come back with me. I have been nothing but caring and respectful towards all of you and I’ve been trying to help. Do not test my patience because it’s wearing thin.”
She caught him off guard then as she pulled her knees to her chest and kicked him away from her. She pushed herself off the wall and tackled him to the ground, sitting on top of him, straddling his waist. “I can take care of myself,” she jabbed him in the chest with her index finger. “Am I free to go?”
“You’re not a prisoner, Bella,” Kol sighed, pinching the bridge of his nose in annoyance. “Tessa merely likes it if I accompany her outside in case something happens. In fact, if it hadn’t been for your current crisis inside your world, I would have taken her on a river cruise today because she expressed interest in it last week.”
Bella seemed to think about it for a moment. “Can we go, instead? I don’t think there’s anyone coming out any time soon and I’m stronger than Tessa, I’m holding her off.”
“We could go next week, I suppose. Bobbie thought it’d be best if we didn’t stray much from home for the next few days.”
She shrugged as she shimmied down his body and when she found the right spot, she wiggled her ass. “I know a way to kill some time… I can feel you’re interested.”
Kol narrowed his eyes on her. “I don’t know you.” So tempting, he was so tempted and wondering why he hadn’t thrown her off of him yet. She was playing with fire. Or had Sparkles come out to play without him noticing?
“Sure you do!” Bella smiled widely. “I’ve been in your house for months! Come on,” she wiggled her ass over his hardon again. “You like this body. You’re a vampire. Take me. Take whatever you want, seeing as you already took me away from what I knew.”
“No,” Kol said as he lifted her off of him and got to his feet. Not like this. He respected her too much. He never even brought it up with Tessa. He was still coming to terms with feeling more than lust for the entire system.
“The rest of us won’t mind,” Bella said as she got up and walked over to the kitchen. “Your loss though, I’m pretty sure that having sex with you would be mindblowing,” she smirked then as she started opening drawers in the kitchen until she found what she was looking for. “You must be thirsty,” she remarked, a devious grin on her face as she turned around with a knife in her hand. “As your pet, it’s my duty to make sure you’re well-fed. Take a nibble,” Bella sliced open her hand with the knife, watching it in fascination. “Eh, it doesn’t even hurt. Sharp knives are a good thing.”
“What the bloody hell!” Kol bit his hand and rushed over to have the cut heal, but Bella’s blood… it was so sweet, so tempting. Extraordinary. He wanted it. All of it. Before he knew it, he had his teeth in her neck and he was greedily drinking from her. He wanted all of it, the more the better. Forget about moderation. About control. He’s been tightly wound for what it seemed like forever. Behaved. Because of the girl.
The girl… The one who he truly cared about because she saw him, whoever was out in front, he was seen. By her. By them. And the girl who he was drinking from right now and her heart had slowed down and she was slumped over in his arms.
“No!” he quickly stopped drinking, realizing what he’d done and started feeding her his blood as he sank to the floor. “No, please,” he cradled her in his arms as he kept pressing his wrist against her mouth. “Please. Please drink. I’m sorry, I’m so sorry,” he wanted to throw up. Kol felt disgusted by himself, she didn’t deserve this. He didn’t deserve her. He had done exactly what she’d been telling him ever since she came out after Tessa.
He took. No control. None whatsoever.
Myriam had been right, too. And Klaus. He wasn’t cut out for this, to take care of someone. The Bella-system was too much. Too much. And his feelings for her were too much.
He was a monster.
Once he was satisfied that she wouldn’t die, he gently put her down on her bed, wrote in the notebooks to Bobbie and Tessa, or at least tried to. He disappointed the both of them. He disappointed himself, and he simply couldn’t find the right words other than ‘I’m sorry’.
Kol then ran across the street straight to Myriam’s hiding place for the remaining dagger, grabbed it and went looking for his brother, who was painting in his study. “Nik.”
“What’s all the ruckus, brother?” Klaus asked before he turned around and saw the state his brother was in. Dishevelled. Bloodied. Tearstained eyes. Concern about his brother filled him and he immediately dropped what he was doing. “Kol?”
“You need to dagger me, Nik. Please. Dagger me. Remove me from her life until she grows old and dies. Please, I’m begging you,” he said as he fell to his knees in front of him and held out the dagger. “Please. I almost killed her because one of her new alters pushed my buttons and knew exactly how to push them. Please.”
“Is the girl alright?”
“Yes, she’s fine, she didn’t die, but I don’t think she’ll be that lucky next time and I can’t… I can’t do this. You and Myriam were right. I can’t do this and she’s too sweet of a person and… Please, just dagger me.”
“Not that I’m pleased that I have a reason to put you in your box, but what of the girl? She can’t stay in your apartment by herself with no help.”
“Find her the best care facility where they can help her so that she can live on her own, grow old, be happy.”
“You can do that yourself.”
Kol grabbed his brother’s hand and pushed the dagger in it as he got to his feet. “I can’t be around her. I don’t deserve her in my life, and I’m certainly not the right person to be in her life. I’m a monster, Nik. Dagger me. If she comes asking, tell her I went away.”
Klaus looked at the dagger and then his brother. “She’s just a girl.”
“No, Nik. She’s not just a girl and as much as it’s strange or not right or whatever you think that she may be, I can’t do this. You were right. I’m not the right person. I’ll kill her next time. So for the sake of her remaining alive, you dagger me, yeah? She’s not in any shape ready to have me ask her if she wants to be turned and I really do not wish to make that choice for her. She deserves a happy life, away from us. Sane and safe.”
Klaus knew what this was. Part truth, proof that his brother was still the happy homicidal maniac he was in the past, but mostly his brother being Kol. Too many emotions and he didn’t know how to handle them. He was afraid, he was heartbroken, disappointed in himself, hungry, and everything else that made him act this way. “Myriam won’t like this.”
“Myriam can go fuck herself. The system has a better chance without me. My choice. I don’t care to live with the pain of being daggered for the rest of her life. It’s what I deserve after what I’ve just done,” Kol looked at his brother, who still had that hesitant look on his face. Grabbing the hand with the dagger, Kol propelled his body forward and daggered himself.
~o.O.o~
“Wake up.”
It hurt hearing his brother’s voice, especially when he followed it up by tossing blood bags into his coffin. It couldn’t have been that long already, Kol would have known that. Felt it. The dagger was gone. Groaning, he reached for one of the blood bags and instantly felt better upon drinking some. His brother wasn’t amused.
“It’s been five years, before you ask. And no, Myriam’s not too happy with you but she promised to bite her tongue until our guest has left.”
“Five? Nik!”
“You have a visitor. Clean yourself up, get dressed, have some more blood and then join us.”
“I don’t—”
“You want to see this visitor yourself. They’re very important so you’d best be on your best behaviour.”
Kol grumbled as he climbed out of his coffin, now realizing where he was; his room at the compound. Nik woke him likely because he wanted to parade his entire, his complete, family in front of some idiot he was conniving with.
This was stupid. As always.
Klaus left, a servant walked in and Kol drained them but the blood didn’t taste good. Neither had the blood bag, to be honest. He didn’t want to be out. He was going to be too tempted to go and try and find Bella. And that wasn’t a good thing.
On his way to the bathroom, his eyes fell upon the painting Dorothy had made when his brother took her to his study while they were setting up things for her and his heart broke. It wasn’t fair. He used his vampire speed to get clean, get dressed and stumble out his room to find Nik with their visitor who was apparently so important that he needed to be awake for.
But he wasn’t expecting this.
Sitting in the drawing room, sipping a nice cup of tea, was Bella, and she looked good. Healthy. Happy. Why was Nik doing this to him? Why? She hadn’t noticed him yet, so he turned to leave.
“Ah! There he is!” Klaus exclaimed, causing Kol to turn back around and letting out a breath. “Kol, this is miss Bella Jenkins, she was desperate to meet you,” he said as he got to his feet. “I’ll leave the two of you alone,” Klaus said and pat his brother on his shoulder with a smirk on his face.
“You can’t do this!” Kol hissed.
“I didn’t. Myriam and I kept an eye on her from afar to see how she progressed, but her coming here is all her doing and you’ll find it interesting to find out how,” he squeezed Kol’s shoulder before leaving.
Kol just looked at Bella, didn’t move an inch from his spot. “Uh, hi,” he eventually said, running a hand through his hair and looking at his feet. He couldn’t do this. His brother was an asshole, this wasn’t what he had wanted.
Bella looked at him. “So… this is so not awkward… I thought I knew everything that happened between you and Tessa or anyone else, but apparently they missed something out?”
What? “Come again?”
She got to her feet and walked over to Kol, her hand extended out to him for him to take. “Hi, I’m Bella Jenkins, formerly known as Bella Swan, but seeing as I apparently died in a huge fire in Forks, they helped me get a new name,” she smiled at him. “And I know that you know that I have various personalities in my system, but I can assure you that I don’t remember anything. All those memories are with my alters. They dug me up in the pits in the inside world. They thought I’d died, but who knew?”
“You’re…”
“The original. Yep. Or you know, the assigned host at birth,” she nodded. “And I’m still worried that I don’t know everything about you… that someone missed a story somewhere.”
“They might have. Why are you here?”
“Come,” she motioned for him to follow her over to the sofa. “I’ll show you.” When Kol didn’t move, she turned around, a questioning look on her face. “What? Look, whatever whoever did—”
“It’s what I’ve done.”
“You made sure we got the right help.”
“No. Yes. After.”
“After… what?”
Kol let out a breath and shook his head. “Nothing. Why are you here.”
She eyed him curiously and sat down on the sofa, patting the empty space next to her for Kol to sit down while she grabbed something from her bag, and Kol recognized one of the notebooks he had given her. “Tessa and Dorothy wrote about you. Shared their memories of you with me. So I know we’ve met before, I just can’t remember it. I can’t really communicate with Tessa, but I feel when she’s close and when she wants to come out, but these notebooks, that you’ve started us on, truly help with talking to everyone in my system.”
He didn’t say anything as he quietly sat down next to her as she flipped through the notebook, there were drawings of him and his family. Of him and a little girl he could only assume was Dorothy and of him and a young woman that could only be Tessa.
“You made quite the impact on them, and I wanted to seek you out years ago, but Tessa didn’t think we were ready for that.”
“You should have stayed away.”
Bella ignored him as she kept browsing through her notebook. “Myriam did bring us to a great facility where they helped us with each other. I was found after a year or so in therapy, after some of the alters integrated with each other. There were a lot of them. Not all friendly, either. I moved out of the facility into a wonderful home here in New Orleans and Bobbie integrated with Tessa last month and then Tessa told us that we were ready to meet you.”
“She’s stupid.”
“Maybe. Myriam said you were traveling and wasn’t sure when you’d be back and that we should continue to live our lives, but we felt that there was something missing. We’ve felt that for a long time now, like a part of us wasn’t there, and I got curious,” Bella shrugged. “Myriam didn’t want to tell me where you were in the world, so… I did a locator spell.”
“A spell?”
Bella grinned as she looked at him. “As it turns out, every part of the system is different and can have abilities. Or allergies that someone else doesn’t have. My magic is basic. I mean, the moment I found out I could do some magic I went and found a witch, but it’s just casual. Very low level magic stuff. I figured I’d do a locator spell to see where you were, based on the drawings Tessa made of you and I was shocked to find out you were here in New Orleans.”
“And here you are.”
Bella nodded. “Can’t say I’m disappointed, I just hoped you’d be more enthusiastic to see me, that’s all. Where did you travel to?”
“Places,” Kol replied as he got back to his feet. “You’ve met me, you’ve seen me, now I’d like you to go. Or you know, stay, I’m certain Myriam will be home soon.”
“I don’t understand… is it me? Is it something I did? Or have you changed your mind about us?” Bella asked with a thin voice as she looked up at him. “Tell me.”
“You’re incredibly stupid to walk into a home filled with vampires.”
“Yeah, I know, but Tessa assured me you were to be trusted.”
“I can’t be trusted!” Kol blurted out. “I sent you away to have a good life. To get better. To be happy. Grow old.”
“But that’s not what Tessa says, nor Dorothy. Or Bobbie, even, before he integrated with Tessa. They think the world of you, you helped us and I want to be friends with you.”
“Darling, I would love that, but it’s a bad idea.”
Bella sighed and nodded. “I understand. I wouldn’t want to try and be friends with someone like me.”
“It’s not you, Bella,” Kol sighed as he defeatedly sat back down next to her again. “You’re not safe around me.”
She huffed then. “I wouldn’t be here if Tessa didn’t trust you. And before you tell me again that you can’t be trusted, I’d like to experience that for myself. So, the first step for you would be to tell me what got you feeling like you do. Or tell me about your travels.”
“I can’t,” he said as he looked at his hands and sighed. “I didn’t go anywhere. I didn’t want to be around while you lived your life for your own safety so after… what I did, I had Nik dagger me. Didn’t give him much of a choice, really. I spent the last 5 years in my box.”
Bella was quiet for a moment, Kol could hear her breathing, but she was likely going to ask ‘why’ and he didn’t want to tell her. If she truly didn’t hold memories, then he didn’t want to upset her.
“You fucker.” He looked up to see that Bella’s entire demeanor had changed. This was Tessa. “You hate being daggered, why the fuck did you do that?”
“You don’t know?”
“No? We woke up, saw your notes and thought you’d left us because Bobbie and I told you that it was going to be rough and we believed you’d given up.”
“No,” he sighed, shaking his head. Myriam must have cleaned her up before she came to. “A new alter came out to play for a while. Middle-Eastern, I think. Called herself Bella. Very provocative and she pushed my buttons.”
“And? I do that too.”
“Yes, darling, you did that too,” he smiled at her. “But I happen to like you and you know your boundaries. She was very anti-vampire, pretty much saying that we’re all the same and to prove it, she cut her hand. I went over to make sure that the wound would heal but…”
“Oh.”
“Yes.”
“Did I at least taste nice?”
Kol looked at her in shock. “What?”
Tessa shrugged. “We’ve had Cold Ones and regular vampires snack on us before, which we didn’t like but I trust you. It was inevitable, and that’s okay. We choose to stay with you even after trying to push you away because we trust you.”
“I could have killed you. And it will likely happen if I remain around you and you don’t deserve that.”
“Then you can feed me some of your blood every single day and if you do end up killing us at some point, we’ll turn. Not sure how that will go with the rest of the system, but the majority of us wants to be with you. Some as friends, me, not so much. I want more,” she grabbed one of her notebooks and playfully smacked him on the head. “You’re a jerk for allowing yourself to be daggered and hide from us. You’re part of our system and if you’re hurting, I want to help. And I want you to get to know Bella. We’re keeping the bad memories from her, she can’t really communicate with the rest of the system apart from these notebooks and this works. And while she doesn’t really feel what we’re feeling, she does feel that a part of her is missing and that stopped the moment you walked into this room.”
“Darling, I—”
“Come live with us. We don’t even have to stay in New Orleans, we can go anywhere. Away from people who think that you’re not good enough. Away from people who’ll think that you’re crazy for having feelings for a crazy person. We all have our issues and ours happen to be that we can be different people, and yours happens to be that you’re a vampire. Who cares.”
“You deserve better.”
“We don’t want anyone better, because to us, you’re the best. We’ll be very happy with our life with you in it, and you deserve happiness too,” she gently took his hand and squeezed it. “Don’t be afraid to hurt us, okay?” She grabbed another notebook out of her bag and thumbed to a page where the system talked about relationships. “I want you. I want you to get to know Bella so that she’ll fall for you as much as I have. We feel safe and protected by you.”
“And you don’t think to stop to think about what I’d want?”
“No, because you already made that abundantly clear with your little stunt with the dagger, and it’s time you stop fighting it. We’re two fucked up beings and we’re an awesome match. Now, let’s go home. Either your place or mine, and let’s plan and talk some more,” Tessa grinned as she started to pack up. “You’re going to love Bella. She’s a witch.”
“Yeah, about that, I thought she was dead?”
“We thought so too, but Jasper had put her deep down in our mind, as it turned out. We don’t know if it’s for safe keeping or because they knew Bella could do magic and were afraid of what she could become,” she got to her feet and smiled at Kol as she pulled him up. “And before you ask, no, I don’t mind sharing the body with her. She’s the original. The first. I’m still here, primary protector and all that.”
Kol took her bag for her and scratched his head. “Shouldn’t you discuss all of this with the rest of you?”
Tessa smirked then. “Already have. They know you’re a part of our system,” she nodded at her bag. “It’s all in those notebooks, if you want to read them and catch up.”
“Those are yours, darling.”
When they were in the courtyard, she stopped him and looked up at him. “Promise me you won’t do anything as stupid as getting yourself fucking daggered because you got scared ever again.”
“I wasn’t—”
“Bullshit. Don’t run away again.”
Kol let out a snort and shook his head. “Who are you and what have you done with Tessa?”
She crossed her arms over her chest and seemed to think for a moment. “Huh,” Tessa seemed impressed. “I guess having Bobbie integrate with me has a bigger effect than I originally thought,” she then grinned. “Cool! Let’s go.”
~o.O.o~
Kol had to give Tessa, and Bella, some credit. Behind their visit and stuff like that was a reason of their therapist moving to another city and they wanted to keep her. And they also wanted to keep Kol, so they moved not that far away from New Orleans, but to Mobile Alabama.
He wasn’t quite sure when he found out about her elaborate plan. Bella wasn’t even sure if she wanted to share their reasoning and private thoughts with him but she did. Where Tessa wanted to share everything with him and he refused, Bella was a bit more closed off, as she should be.
I feel something’s missing – B
Kol. – D
Kol? – B
Tessa likes him very very much. – D
Shut up. – T
Can he be trusted? – J
He’s part of our system. He’s a vampire and before you get your panties in a twist, yes, he can be trusted. – T
Let’s find him and see if that’s the missing piece. – J
I can’t believe they’re leaving us to get a new practise somewhere else – T
Any therapist is fine. – B
NO THEY’RE NOT. – J
I LIKE JERI. OH AND SORRY FOR SMASHING THAT VASE – D
We were set up with this fully furnished apartment by Myriam. It gives us a false sense of independence. We can’t move to Mobile like that. It’ll destroy us. – B
FIND KOL. – T
We can’t rely on him to help us out. – J
He likes us and I miss him. – D
Kol lets us keep our independence. He knows us and knows when we’re not good to do something. We need to find him. – T
This doesn’t sound healthy, at all. – J
We’re not healthy and neither is he. We’re perfect together. Two pieces make one whole being. – T
I told you Tessa really really likes him. – D
“Who’s J?” Kol asked as he put the notebook down and started to unpack Bella’s bag. There were a few boxes still in the truck, mostly the things he bought 5 years ago for the littles and things for the grownups. They didn’t need much, especially since he had found them a home and had compelled some vampires to make it habitable for them.
“Uh, you don’t know?” Bella asked as she looked at the guy who had caught Tessa’s eye. He was hurt, she could see that, she had seen that back in New Orleans, and here he was, helping them. “Of course you don’t… Uh, J is for Jamie. He and Tessa don’t like each other much, going off of the notes and all, but he’s a bit of a yin to Tessa’s yang, a bit like Bobbie but a lot milder. He takes care of the littles now, after Bobbie and Tessa integrated.”
“Good to know,” Kol replied as he started to put Bella’s clothes into her closet, in her own bedroom with the door still open so she could see and hear him.
“He’s easy to spot, really. He’s deaf.”
“What?”
“Deaf. He can read lips though, and he can communicate with you through writing, if you don’t know sign language.”
Kol sighed. “I’ll go and teach myself some sign language.”
“You don’t have to do that.”
Once he was done with her bag, he made his way back to Bella with a smile on his face. “Darling, Jamie is a part of you and he’s his own person. If he prefers to communicate in sign language, then I shall learn sign language. Same goes for you, if you want to learn more about magic, I’ll be more than happy to teach you.”
Bella furiously blushed. “You don’t have to.”
“What if I want to?” He squatted down in front of her. “Magic is something to be celebrated. It’s magical and fun. I won’t teach you anything you can hurt others with if you don’t want to. I’m here to keep you safe.”
“I have Tessa for that. You have Tessa for that.”
“True,” he let out a snort. “But I’m faster and stronger than Tessa, and nobody is ever going to hurt you again,” he playfully nudged her knees. “So I’m going to teach you fun magic. Make things pretty. Or sparkle or explode in butterflies. Whatever you want.”
“What if I want to protect this house a bit more?”
“Then I’ll teach you how to do that.”
“Why are you being so nice? What’s in it for you?”
He let out a sigh and sat down on the table in front of her. “You know the story of how I came to Forks and how I gave your system a choice of where to go?”
Bella nodded. “You weren’t expecting them to say they’d come with you.”
“I wasn’t supposed to agree to that,” he let out a small chuckle. “But we became friends and I really like your system, and I want to get to know you, too. I want to work hard on making sure I know you all and making sure you’re all safe and happy,” he replied. “I don’t know what happened there. I’m not really a caring person. I care about one person and that’s me. And then you walked into my life. And it’s a frightening thought, that you have so much influence on me but…”
“It feels right.”
“Yes.”
“I feel that too, and maybe that’s Tessa’s influence as I can feel she’s close to the surface but something was missing, and now you’re here and it feels better. So I’m just as curious about you as you are about me, but this is all really overwhelming.”
“I understand. How about I go to the little corner shop and get us something to eat and drink and you take it easy? Perhaps think of how you want to redecorate. Take as long as you need to decide, I can’t wait to see what you’ll come up with.”
“But the apartment is decorated!”
Kol shrugged as he looked around. “I don’t like it much, aside from the furniture. Maybe we can paint the walls together. And, of course, should you desire different kinds of furniture, then we can always go shopping for it too.”
“You’re insane!”
“Look who’s talking!” Kol laughed. “In all fairness, this apartment is habitable, but it doesn’t scream either one of us who needs to live in this place,” he then got up and grinned. “I’ll be back in about fifteen minutes.”
“Could you lock the front door?”
“Of course.”
~o.O.o~
He was rudely awakened by a knee to the groin as Bella turned around. Then again, Bella or Tessa would be delicate, even in their sleep, this was someone less refined. “Morning, Dorothy,” he groaned before quickly getting out of bed to pull on some underwear.
“Morning,” she giggled. “It’s my day today!”
“That’s right,” Kol nodded. “How about you take a shower and get dressed and I’ll take care of some breakfast?” He was relieved to find out a few months ago that Dorothy could now get dressed and shower on her own. Just because she was a little, didn’t mean she had to stop doing the basic needs that a human needed, and she could safely take showers without scalding herself.
And yes, it was only with Dorothy that he quickly got dressed if he’d wake up with someone else because she was a child. A little. He had some common sense, buried deep inside of him. Dorothy, of course, was currently naked because he went to bed with Bella the night before.
“Where we going today?”
“We’re going to do a boat tour. And we’ll have some food, wherever you want, and after that, we’re going to see a movie.”
Dorothy’s eyes grew big. “That new Disney one?”
“Maybe,” Kol laughed as he pointed towards the bathroom. “Go, get cleaned up.”
“Yay!” Dorothy giggled as she hopped off the bed, ran to the dresser to get her clothes and went into the bathroom. Kol took a quick shower in the other bathroom, and got dressed before he started to make pancakes in the kitchen.
Kol had made it his duty to get to know everyone in the Bella system. There was some control over who came out, and especially when avoiding any negative triggers. Dorothy had wanted to spend time with Kol for a very long time now, so with the proper communication with Bella and Tessa, they had planned a day for Dorothy.
His general anxiety about being around Bella and everyone who shared her body had gone away for the most part after moving away from his family. His blood lust was something he still didn’t quite have under control, but it was manageable.
And Bella… she was so good to him, her – and Tessa’s – influence was so calming and he wondered how he got so lucky.
“Pancakes! You’re burning them!” Dorothy called out as she came running into the kitchen.
He quickly turned off the stove and pushed the plate to a different hob, seeing that it was ruined. “Well then,” he smiled widely. “Good excuse to have a naughty breakfast,” he winked at her.
“McDonalds?” Dorothy wondered out loud. “Although Jamie says we should have something healthy or as healthy as pancakes.”
“They have a breakfast option at McDonalds,” Kol grinned as he took his keys and his money and offered his hand to Dorothy. “Jamie has nothing to worry about, it’s your day out, after all. If we’re going to eat horrible, greasy food for breakfast, then we’re going to have horrible, greasy food.”
“He really says ‘no’,” Dorothy pouted. “It’s better to clean the pan and make new pancakes.”
“Well, isn’t he the party pooper,” Kol said as he lifted Dorothy up to sit on the kitchen counter and started to scrub the pan. He had quickly learned not to go against Jamie’s wishes, and for Jamie to be so close to Dorothy meant that Dorothy time could be over in an instant. “Pancakes it is.”
They had a lovely day out and Dorothy really liked the movie in the cinema. As expected, they had tickets to see the new Disney movie and afterwards, Kol took her to a toy store where she could buy herself a new toy.
As Dorothy had become tired, he had food with Jamie at a small and quiet restaurant, and then they spent the evening playing video games.
It had been a good day.
Good days were good.
- the end